I am so sick. Really really sick. I almost don't know if there's any point in my talking about it. (but here I go...) At different times in high school I had pneumonia and strep throat, but since then I can't remember being this sick. After the stomach flu stuff (btw, Clark threw up as recently as this afternoon... I almost wonder if the illness made him lactose intolerant or something. He seems to be fine unless he has any formula or milk, as little as a couple of sips) I got Frances's cough and then a stuffy nose, and then I spent all day Sunday and Monday in bed. I thought I was going to be able to rest it off, but then all of a sudden I woke Monday night in the night so sick, so much pain in my ears that I couldn't sleep. I called the doctor the next morning but they couldn't see me until that afternoon. It just got worse and worse, and while I waited in the office I paced and cried because of the pain (the doctor took forever getting there. I finally went out into the hallway to find out what the hell).
Double ear infection plus sinus infection. ("Oh my!" he said, "Yup, that's a raging ear infection.")
What adults get ear infections?? I thought the antibiotics would work right away but it's taking time... I can't hear anything but loud white noise and I feel nauseated all the time, probably because my equalibrium is off. My ribs hurt from coughing, my legs ache, my head aches, and I'm dizzy and exhausted when I stand up. The pain in my ears last night was tremendous (really really astonishing pain) and my fever was over 102 but today it's better. My mom was here, you know, which meant she got to hang out with the kids while I slept. I more or less haven't seen the kids in days. I just took my mom to the airport a little bit ago and now the sitter is outside pulling the kids in the wagon. I probably won't see them before bed.
Okay, typing this has worn me out and I'm going to close my eyes again.
I want to write about my not seeing Clark and how he doesn't now want to look at me, how he turns away from me, angry that I've been so absent. But I can't right now.